That XX

"She's just a girl, and she's on fire"
I am. I'm on fire. I'm burning. Burning with passion. Burning with motivation. Burning with hatred.

It's 1am. I can't sleep. Some things sparked my memory of something, someone.

I hate you.

I hate what you've done to me.

I'm angry. I'm not pleased with the way things ended. 我不满意。非常不满意。

How could you do this to me? Me, Amelia. Fuck you, seriously, fuck you.

I have to admit, you know me more than I know myself.

Scumbag Strindberg.

Maybe I am the modern day Miss Julie. Fuck you Strindberg.

Everything's crumbling within me.

I try to keep a happy front. I desperately want to fool myself. I want you to see how well I'm doing. Honestly, I don't even know what to think anymore.

Sometimes I feel like things would have been better if none of this happened. Almost everything would be different now.


"You can try but you'll never forget her name"
I hope so.

Do I sympathise with Julie? The question is like me asking myself, how pathetic are you?

I will find closure when I see you suffer.

You're close to becoming the third person.

You're Jean.

Fuck you.


"Nobody knows that she's a lonely girl,
And it's a lonely world,
But she gon' let it burn, baby, burn, baby"


Some days I hate the shit out of you. Some days I miss the shit out of you.

They both occur during nights like this.

Greetings

HEY GIRL, HOW YOU DOIN'?

Emma's 17th Birthday (Kpop) Party

So a few weeks ago, I was invited to an event called "Emma's surprise birthday party". I was invited by Emma herself, and she said that because she is a sad person, she's throwing herself a surprise party. I should also probably note that it was Kpop themed. On the day, almost all the boys had eyeliner put on them, some managed to narrowly escape :(

I had wanted to go as Hyosung from Secret, and I drew inspiration from this outfit I spotted her in:

I tried to recreate the look myself, but I ended up looking like a total slut.

I ended up wearing a jumper over the top of it instead. #nerd Oh Hyosung, if only I could be you, bamf.


Ciara and I, being the good friends we are, decided that we should throw her a real surprise party. In the event, she stated that she wanted to go to Redbox (a karaoke place in Gurney Plaza).

Hence, a couple days before the party, Ciara and I headed to Redbox, and booked the VIP Party Room. Yes.

We also bought her a cake from Humble Beginnings, it's a crepe cake shop at Straits Quay.

I don't really know what else to type, so I'll let the pictures do the talking! :)

The room

 Birthday girl!

 Wii. Ming looking preppy.

With Enna! :)  

Las tres amigas!  

Group photo before everyone left. 

Back row: Hani, Junming, Yang, Alex, Ming, Max

Front row: Chloe, Charissa, Angela, Enna, Me, Emma, Ciara, Hannah, Hayley

Chloe! :) Doesn't she resemble Kaya Scodelario? 

 Chloe and I bonded quite a bit that night.

So yeah, that was Emma's successful surprise party! I'm really glad that we did this for her.

To Emma,
WE LOVE YOU.

2012 - A Year in Review [Last Update - 13/01/2013]

NOTE: I will constantly be adding new photos to this post as I find more photos or remember more things that happened. This is somewhat my 2012 memory vault. Do feel free to leave any comments / feedback :)


Fairly long post ahead. Took me about two weeks, because I'm a lazy bum. Do read in sections if you're bound to get bored easily. Picture heavy. Click to enlarge photos! :) x

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly. It all happened. And here I am, coming clean. Note to self: Don't be embarrassed. It was all part of your life.

January

I spent New Years in Singapore. On the 31st, Lara, Alicia, Aunty Wee Hong, Aunty Anne, and I had watched Wicked at Marina Bay Sands. Went out with my relatives after the show, and spent the New Year shopping at Mustafa. Hands down, best way to spend New Years ever! (I'm not a big fan of being at an unshaded place with lots of fireworks)

When I got back to Penang, we had a 'surprise' birthday party for Emma. You could say it was a fail, as we had it in a secluded area on the beach, and the wind would just not allow us to successfully keep a fire for long enough, but yet, you could say that it was pretty epic. Emilie and I were almost attacked by a dog whilst walking to 7-11 to get some drinks and cardboard for the fire. Not long later, it started raining. Yes. It started raining. So we moved everything to the poolside, where we managed to stay just for a bit, because then, a thunderstorm decided to greet us. Us not being in the 'best' state of mind, we were laughing and hiding in a corner. Mhmm. Just imagine.

Birthday girl inhaling some Helium. We definitely had fun with that!

Birthday Girl! ♥

February
I don't remember much from February, apart from it being Chinese New Year, and Richie coming back during Valentines Day. Emma and I were also invited to Joachim's birthday party, where we bowled at Penang Bowl, then dined at TGIF Paragon. Oh and how could I forget, my great big fall.

Found this in my pencil case after Lara returned to Australia, she must have somehow slipped it in!  ♥

Hipster Hani. It was non-uniform day.

This photo got many likes on Facebook. Hence it should have its place in the Hall of Fame. 

I like this one. 

Joachim's birthday lunch. It took me a while to make out which is Ciara and which is me. (I'm still not entirely sure)

WARNING: SKIP THIS PHOTO IF YOU CANNOT HANDLE THE SIGHT OF BLOOD AND 'GORE'.

March

Nothing much happened in March. The drama students had their performance at PenangPAC in Straits Quay. I did attend the show, as those involved were all from my year. After the show, Ciara, Emma, Hani and I headed to Spasso's for dinner. This was the time when they put tabasco sauce in my otherwise delicious Iced Lemon Tea (they insisted the extra tabasco was better than conventional Iced Lemon Tea. I would like to fully disagree). This month, I had also spent countless hours in school trying to perfect my Design & Technology Graphics final project. 

Definitely, definitely working hard. 

The final products!

♥

These photos made us laugh. Hard. 

April

Nothing happened.

May

Exams happened. 

June

Life started again. I had the first two weeks off, with my Media Studies exam only happening on the 16th. Hence, I went to China with my family. Woooo. The route was Penang → KL → Hong Kong → Kunming → Lijiang → Zhongdian → Kunming → Hong Kong → KL → Penang.

I also graduated from high school.

Year 11 IGCSE Class of 2012 (Not everyone was present)

Roxanne - Hayley - Ciara - Amelia

Tibet (Shih Tzu) and Tikam (Pomeranian)

July

My #YOLO (shut up Amelia) Singapore trip! MTV World Stage at Sunway Lagoon, where I enjoyed the company of Kara, Jay Park, Mizz Nina, and that Justin Bieber guy. Holly Grabarek is my new god. It was also my birthday. 

Singapore

My solitary birthday lunch. Was yummy. 

August

My paternal grandfather passed away a couple days before we were scheduled to fly to England. I got the job of calling / emailing each hotel. Woop! It was a good experience though. School started the day after I came back from England. The route was Penang → Singapore → London → Cambridge → Manchester → Plymouth → Bristol → London.

September

School started. Year 12, IB Diploma, scary scary! During the second or third week of school, we went off to Jerejak Island for the Year 12 retreat. Three days two nights of fun filled activities and challenging tasks!

Our group was the best overall. Go G Force!

October

The month of heartbreaks. Heh. BUT. It was also the month of BIG BANG. Life is fair. We also had a Halloween disco at school, and the theme was Batman. I tried to channel a Catwoman-esque look. Ciara went as Robin, and Emma went as Poison Ivy. Lise was the ultimate winner that night, I was quite terrified of her the whole night, I have to admit! Headed down to KL for Big Bang with Ciara, one of my best trips ever.

Toilets are just so beautiful.

Lise and Emilie

Night before Big Bang

Why so serious?

MY BABY. 

November

Nothing much happened. Study study study. 

December

Grandpa fell off the stairs the day before I was due to fly to Singapore. I was terrified when I saw him once I got home from school. I managed to sort out everything for him before I went to Singapore. Singapore was fun as usual, but I also did get pissed off at some points because of the same reasons. Surprisingly, all I bought was a dress from New Look, and a Christmas jumper for Lara from Forever 21. Spent Christmas in KL with Lara, and experienced Dining in the Dark on Boxing Day. New Years was spent cooking, watching movies, and making resolutions with Lara. Its almost a New Years tradition to spend it together now. I love you Lara. 

So that pretty much wraps up my 2012! At some point, I will be adding even more photos, when I decide to get less lazy. 

My feelings about this year? 

Not telling anyone.